Two Solutions

The tyrants in certain countries rule for fifty and sixty years. Why not save time and money by letting whoever is on the throne die a natural death and then mummify him. The tyranny could go on, money would be saved, and there would be no need for palace coups or expensive exiles on the Riviera. Think of the lives saved!

*****

Anna Karenina was a miserable lady who left her husband, who was as stiff and dried up as driftwood. She ran off with Count Vronski, a dashing soldier. They went all over downtown Europe trying to find some place where they fit, with no luck. Ultimately, she killed herself. Solution? Baltimore. Anna and Vronski could have eloped to Baltimore. He could easily get a job teaching military science at Annapolis and she — a countess, would become the darling of Baltimore society. They would later smuggle her son out of Russia where, in Baltimore, he could become a cadet. Tolstoi never thought about America, or set any of his works there, and it’s a crying shame. Had he figured that out, he might have saved her life and given a kick to both economies.